Notes

I told you many times that i will not have a time and i can't talk to someone. I got fired and i cried a lot. I needed a time to forget it. I forgave your mistake about it (you said this to anvella). I am still in depression since 2 years. I wanted to kill myself. I am not so jealous person, i don't care about your sentence for sollyun. I know you are friend with him. I was really living so bad days and you just texted me once. I wanted you to check up on me. You could think that oh he got fired from the only place that he forgets his exam for a bit, he has an exam and he has to study 15h in a day, he is in depression etc. But i know that it is my mistake as well. So i said sorry for this. I am really so sorry but you just didn't understand me. If i told you that Chloe, i will not have a time so wait me for a bit (for my exam) then we can solve every problems (like i'll learn english etc). But you are thinking that i left you. I didnt leave you. I was keeping your love in my heart. But you stopped love me. Why did you do this? If you were really love me, you wouldn't do this to me. Because loving person can wait her love. You are thinking that i am normal person. I am not.
What are you waiting from the person that in depression? You were going to wait me and we would be so happy together. But you didn't wait me. You are leaving from me just in 2 weeks. Discord shows me im online even i am not, it is opening by itself when i turned on pc. I was gonna talk to you after studying a bit but then guess what did i see? You called me MY FRIEND. You finished everything about us in your mind. You can't know how much am i sad. Anyways, I didn't like it when you made me feel jealous when you would say something like "I'm gonna talk with other girls and flirt." /// I SWEAR i didn't do this. It was just joke. I was always joking with this sentence. But fuck myself, i flirted with anvella. I am so fucking regret from this. I said sorry billion times.
I never did this before. I am really so fucking sorry chloe. After this, i stopped talking to her. I didn't flirt with her for a long time, it was just for a few hours. But i am so fucking regret and i was so upset cuz of this. Then you said, Ayberk i forgive you, i am like that person. So, why are you opening this topic again? You didn't wait me chloe and it is making me cry. And you deleted me from everywhere. Now you are saying this again. I gave up from studying just because i wanted to talk to you and make you happy when you were sad cuz of your ex. Didn't i do this? I wish i could be a better boy for you. Or, my only wish is; i wish you knew me when i was happy. Everything would be different. I would make you happy. But as you know, i am in depression since 2-3 years. know that i hurted you a lot. I am so fucking sorry for everything i did. My mistakes only put a hole in my heart and it hurts a lot. I just want you to understand me. I regret from everything. I couldn't know myself while i talked with anvella. You know i am always joking around but everything about her wasn't serious at all. I apogolized about it many times then you said i forgive you.
Chloe, you can't know how much i am regret from this. Exes try to make feel in love again. Therefore i was jealous about vincent. It seems he is trying to make you fell in love again. I trust you so you cant do this just after 2 weeks. But if i am not your boyfriend. You can be with another person. What can i say? Please don't make me cry chloe. I really want to kill myself. I regret from everything but you must realize that I LOVED YOU SO FUCKING BAD. You were the only person for me. Nobody can love you more than me. You won't understand this. I put much efforts just make you happy before. There will not be a person that will talk to you without english. I really loved you. Be aware of this. I did many mistakes, you did many mistakes. But people should forgive each other if they are regret from their mistakes. Look at your sentences that you sent me before. http://notes.io/8Jtb