Notes

It was two in the morning. Keiko was on her laptop, scrolling through a website. On the website all she saw was thin, pretty girls. She wanted to be like those girls, and she didn't care what it took. So, she had been starving herself. For quite a while now. She would eat occasionally. Not often, however. When she did eat, she always felt regret, and she always tried to fix it. She felt her stomach hurt. "What am I doing to myself?" she thought. "Just... Stay strong. You're not hungry." she told herself. Anything to fool herself. She reached for the water on her nightstand. She took a sip, set the glass down, and continued scrolling. Pictures of models, singers. She saw a picture of Elesa. She smiled remembering getting to model with Elesa in Unova. She frowned remembering looking the mirror at the photoshoot and thinking about how fat she looked. She continued scrolling. Sana! Her childhood idol. She was so thin, so beautiful. Keiko wanted to be like her. She had eaten so much today, she wished she could erase it... Maybe she could... She didn't know how, so she googled it.

"How to make yourself throw up"

She tied her hair in a tight bun to avoid anything getting on her hair. She positioned her face over the toilet. She got nervous. Part of her said not to do it. But then she thought about Elesa, and Sana. She needed to do this. To be like them. "Just like them." she whispers to herself. She shoves two of her fingers back into her throat. She gags on them at first and gasps. She wants to stop. More images of Sana, Elesa, and other thin girls she idolized filled her mind. She continued. She couldn't hold it back anymore. She threw up. She breathed heavily. She felt absolutely disgusting. She grabbed a tissue and wiped her mouth. She flushed the toilet and walked over to the scale.

She had lost five pounds. /Five/. She gasped and smiled. Worth it.

She went back to her bed, took another swig of water, and then tucked herself in. She was so excited. She felt so empty, but so, so excited.