Notes

Hello Grayson
I wanted to MAIL you a letter, even if it just had one word on it, because I have always wanted to slip in an envelope in those big blue tin bins. But I guess you have limited my award winning letter writing skills to an online 'enote.' Letters usually include favorite memories or hopes for the future, and to write about these kind of things is hard because our memories are on the short end of the list. I know we were in a very tough spot when you left and I really regret it. I regret everything that happened, I wish we could go back to when we first started talking! I would not have kissed you!!!!!! Remember how I said you are never suppose to kiss someone you like and you always asked why.. Well now you know the answer! We could have been great friends and had a chance to say goodbye to each other.. But although I regret how we left off, I don't regret anything that happened in between everything. I hope that because we are friends means we can talk about stuff without things getting awkward, and by this I mean the times we had, most weren't much but I really enjoyed all of them. I am a sucker for almost anything! I HOPE YOU STILL HAVE THAT GREEN RIBBON! If you don't I will be super disappointed! We said we would keep them forever! I paid 50 cents for that! I'M CLASSY! Although I found the dollar on the ground.. It's weird how I can remember the simplest of things, but when I try to think of things we did all I can think of is... inappropriate.. OOH We went ice skating (: I enjoy taking people there because it is the only place where I will be better than everyone and able to prove i'm not a piece of shit! Also that night we walked around my neighborhood and you tried to get little flowers from the tree and the whole branch fell on us, well more on me!! But that was one of the better memories because I still have those little flowers! I keep everything that people give me, whether it be from a friend or an ex. I don't think its weird to have memories! I keep things because I have a terrible memory and I need something to look at to feel the happiness. You said we can be friends this time and I hope we do stay friends! I love having you in my life even as just a friend! I hope that if one day you come down and visit, that you will set aside just a few hours of one day for me! I hope that I am important enough for a few hours! With everything we have been through, I was just someone you needed to distract your mind, but no matter why we started talking and hanging out, there is too much of a relationship to ignore(relationship being anything from friends to what we were) I am glad we are snapchatting so often the past few days! Maybe we can video chat sometime if you'd like! You can tell me about New York and your grandparents and how your family is doing! Oh and my 'award winning writing skills' are a bunch of jumbled thoughts scrambled onto this page with no flow because it is 3:30 in the morning. By the way.... HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY *fireworks* I don't know why you wanted the letter so badly tonight, I could have perfected it by the time you got a house and situated! Or I could of just sent it to your grandparents house! But whatever, I will just write myself a letter and see how long it takes to get to me! Well It is now 3:52 am and I walked downstairs to my mom screaming at me for not wearing pants! I didn't think anyone was up, and it is my house too! I deserve to be free! Well I should write something else so the letter doesn't end in me not wearing pants. GOLDFISH gotta love 'em. xoxo-alexis