Chara woke up in the middle of the night again. Tears were streaming down her face and her red line that loved to make itself known wasn't helping at all. Her breaths were in hiccups, and she was on the edge of a panic attack. Her chest was constricting and she took a huge breath. She held the breath as she drew her legs up to her chest and curled her arms around it. She let the breath out and slumped down on her legs. She knew she wasn't falling asleep anytime soon, but she couldn't bring herself to move just yet. She was hurting, she knew she should have stopped. But she didn't, and though she can't change the past, it still hurts like a bitch. It reminds her that she can still fly off the hook, fall into her old habits again. But she won't, and she will never do it again. She won't because she has a reason not to. It only helps that she became friends with the monsters. All except one of course. Before she could ponder harder on the one that she couldn't befriend (and subsequently getting the most on her nerves) she slid out of her bed. She couldn't think about him at the minute. It hurt so damn badly, and she really needed to clear her mind, not because she didn't like him, quite the contrary actually. But because she knows he would never like her back, and it would only cause unwanted problems. She shook her head to clear her mind as she pushed open her window, letting the cool breeze of the night inside. She calmly closed her eyes as she let the moonlight wash over her body, and the breeze blow her hair out of her face. She breathed in and released the breath, opening her eyes to view the familiar calmness of the night. She was a split second from hopping out the window, when something felt off. It was another second of waiting before her body started coughing uncontrollably. Her body fell forward onto the windowsill, and her chest felt like it was on fire as she coughed hard into her hand. By the time she stopped coughing, she was gripping the windowsill weakly as she kept her hand clamped onto her mouth. She felt liquid pooling against her hand, and two unfamiliar things in her mouth. Disgusted, she spit the things in her mouth out with the same hand that was clamped to her mouth. On her hand, she found two petals, with splotches of rust colored blood in the moonlight, and a whole lot more blood covering her hand. Her eyes widened as she inspected the flowers with her other hand. One was a glowing cyan flower petal, one she easily recognized as an echo flower petal. The other was a rather large petal. It was a pastel yellow color. Chara was only confused a moment, before what flower this was hit her. Suddenly, three things became clear. 1) The flower petal in her hand was a Gardenia, which was partially symbolized by secret love. 2) Chara had suddenly developed the Hanahaki Disease, which meant she was officially in love, and it wasn't being requited. And lastly 3) She had a pretty damn good idea of who she fell for by the cyan petal in her hand, and it made her want to cry. She had fallen for the one monster she couldn't be friends with. Of course fate wanted to be cruel enough to make her love the one who remembers the death she caused. No matter how many times she apologized, a sorry isn't going to cut it. It sure as hell hasn't yet. She stumbled backward from the window, making her way from the window to her bookshelf. Sans the godamn skeleton. Why do you have to do this to me? Suddenly, Chara started coughing again, hard and painful. When she pulled her hand away, there were more petals in her hand. More Gardenia's, and Echo Flowers. Her chest was in pain, and so was her heart as she realized what would happen. There's no way she would remove the flowers from herself, no matter how much the others would beg. She won't let herself become a literal bag of flesh, blood, bones, and nothing else. She needs feelings to keep herself from harming others, and removing the flowers without removing the right memories is like asking for a murder spree. So now that she's coughing up flowers, eventually they will clog up her lungs. She'll die from suffocating, the flowers in her lungs too much for her to be able to breathe. Well, first things first. I have to hide this. There's no way they can figure this out. It will only make it hurt more. Summoning her strength, Chara stood up and stumbled the rest of the way to her drawer. "Why does love hurt so much?" She quietly asked herself as she placed the petals into one of her empty drawers. "Why" "Love" "Hurt" It almost sounded like a question to her. Chara was mildly shocked, but chalked it up to the Echo flowers messing with her. She made a soft quieting noise and closed the drawer. The cool air of outside drafted inside enough for it to be cool in Chara's room, so she walked much steadier to the window and closed it. From there, she walked over and collapsed on her bed. The blood. What about the blood? With a groan, Chara rolled off the bed and stalked over to her closet, where she kept her towel. She wiped her hand off with the towel, and trailed right back to bed. She sighed as she stared at the ceiling. I deserve this cruel twist of fate, but that doesn't make it hurt any less. Tears pricked at the corner of her eyes, but she turned onto her side and forced herself to go back to sleep instead.
