Notes

I'm lost, in a sea of blue.
But not the ocean, not to you.
I am hurt, but you don't see,
because I cover it with a smile, that is the key
I can hide my feelings, but only for a while,
because at the end of the day, when I'm all alone...
I can smile for you, but not for me.
But when you leave me alone, the true me shows.
I sit down, out of view, and let everything come all at once.
I feel pain, a pain you will never understand.
I am hurt in ways you cannot heal with medicine, or bandages.
Or alcohol and other beverages.
This type of hurt can only go down two different paths
There is the path of happiness and fun, laughing and joking.
A place where I stay with you, and get to see you smile.
Or there's the place of darkness, which shall not be spoken of,
for that would make you sad, or mad, or frightened.
No matter which way I go, I want you to know I love you.
When you leave me alone, I sit and I cry.
I let my mind drift further and further from reality.
Then, when my mind gets back to earth,
I look in the mirror and see tear stains, running all the way underneath my shirt.
But then I look at my arms, something only I will see.
I see the scars, which have taken over me.
Then, I sit. I stare at my reflection, and she stares back.
A mess, but we don't care.
We have a staring competition, like every night.
We always tie, but we don't care.