Notes

Feelings: April 28

Sometimes I feel like certain people who I talk to on Twitter are way too childish and it makes me stop and question what the hell i’m doing hanging around with 16, 17, even 18 year olds who make dumb sex / lesbian / vagina / suicide / etc jokes

I honestly don’t get a lot of that stuff and I don’t ever find it funny, I do find redeeming qualities in a lot of the people on twitter i’m friends with but by that same token sometimes I REALLY can’t relate.

My life is very different from most people’s and i’m compensating for the fact that people my age are already doing shit with their lives by hanging with younger people who are still in a similar situation to me. The people I like talking to the most are probably people my age.

Ok this is good. writing shit down really helps. Honestly I want someone to see these things i’m writing, not sure why. I wan’t someone to understand how i’m feeling even though they aren’t meant to be so invested in my life. I might be selfish in that way. People got their own lives to live man.

Does this sound pretentious as fuck? idk.

P.S. Fuck Repteal he’s annoying as fuck and childish as fuck, if nobody else sees it then idk but I hate the stupid childish things he says and the 5th grade level sex jokes he makes, and it also makes me really uncomfortable when he “jokes” with my friends about shit like marriage or having sex etc. especially since he’s underage. I wish he knew how much this fucking bothered me. Also: stop making everything about yourself. PLEASE. You don’t realize this maybe, but every time someone says anything, you go “OOH MEE TOO” and sometimes you try and 1-up the other person. Like when I said to annah that she can stay at my place for her extra days at vidcon and you go “Oh I can take some extra days I guess why not” Like no I wasn’t talking about you man. So, anyways, when you complain on your PUBLIC TWITTER about people not liking you (for attention obviously) maybe this will help you understand. stop making yourself so fucking unlikeable and maybe you won’t have this problem.

I’m just writing down things I might say if I had the balls. HERE’S THE THING ABOUT HIM MAN, I can’t give him “criticism” of the way he acts cuz that shit is gonna make him sad and think people don’t like him and i’m not the type to hurt someone’s feelings… like FUCK but someone needs to put him in his place and help him realize this so he’s not disliked by everyone for like the rest of his life without understanding why…

Annah already knows all this shit and she kind of agrees with me, she said she’s not really friends with him but he’s friends with spicy and he edits the podcast which is why she talks to him. She said those weird jokes / not jokes that he makes about them getting married makes her really uncomfortable. If you notice she goes along with it on twitter only because she doesn’t want to seem like she’s bothered by something like that.